Sophie

So, I think my cat is psycho. And I don't mean in this in the slang, she is just silly, kind of way because I hate when people use that word in slang. I think that Sophie has some serious mental issues. Why do I think this? Let me list the reasons...

* She eats Q-Tips -- pica, oppositional defiant disorder

* She locks herself in closets -- agoraphobia

* She sleeps on my face -- seperation anxiety disorder, oppositional defiant disorder

* She is scared of my cell phone -- telephonobia

* She prefers toilet water over her water bowl (I think this is because she just likes to get her paws wet and then run across my face as I'm laying on the couch) -- conduct disorder

* She likes to play with dangerous hooks -- pain disorder, oppositional defiant disorder

* She will not let me eat until she eats -- narcissistic personality disorder

* She meows continually if I don't get out of bed by 7 -- obsessive compulsive disorder, oppositional defiant disorder

* She steals Christmas ornaments from my tree -- kleptomania, oppositional defiant disorder